Here I am on a Sunday morning. I didn’t sleep well last night. I hadn’t chosen my rant for the next week and literally thousands of prospective rants were running through my head making me toss and turn all night. I had to choose wisely.
Should I choose to rant about the person who parked in two parking spots across the street from the pharmacy on Main Street? No, that would be too personal. So would the armored pickup truck who took two parking spots at Walmart where I go for entertainment, but not to shop. He must have been part of the entertainment.
I could say something about the state legislature and governor wanting to raise the fees on all licenses, car registrations, and gas taxes. But the money seems to be going to a good place. They are laying off 11% of ODOT staff, refusing to remove snow or fix potholes, but the money will go for overtime for officers to make sure everyone is wearing their seatbelts over Labor Day. We can breathe a sigh of relief knowing that our state government is trying so hard to keep us safe.
Then there’s the federal level where I could rant all day about their inability to effectively govern the country without giving in to interest groups who pay them outrageous amounts of money that are not considered bribes because the money is supposedly for their campaigns. Their brains are all petrified, and ranting wouldn’t do any good anyway.
I should rant about the fully loaded logging truck that roared through town on our little two-lane highway that cuts the town in half. What the hell was he thinking? He was going about 55 where the limit was 35 miles an hour. Does he think that this little town has no children, pets, or disabled people who might get run over by his truck? I did see, in the Brownsville Times police report section, that the police have recently ticketed several drivers for excessive speed while driving through town. Good work!
I thought about ranting about the heat wave we’re experiencing, but I knew it would bring out the misinformed to harass me about global warming and just piss Mother Nature off. You don’t want to do that to Mother Nature. You’ll be sorry. She will turn up the heat on you for that.
Nothing. Rant about nothing like the old Jerry Sienfeld show about nothing. Yes! Let’s rant about nothing. Only problem is that nothing is the absence of everything. With everything absent, there is nothing to rant about. Shoot!
How about inflation? Everybody hates inflation. It makes their cost of living go up while their wages don’t keep pace. Well, good choice, but nothing will come of ranting about it. As long as the economy and the government are controlled by wealthy individuals and as long as they benefit from inflationary cycles, nothing can be done. Any effort in that direction is a waste of time.
Oh, yeah! My phone. Now there’s a rant. Dumb thing won’t ring sometimes when I get a call and they keep updating it. The updates change the way it works, takes away some of the buttons I am used to and puts in others that I have no idea of what they do. Recently, my phone updated, and I couldn’t get the damn thing to answer a call. I was so frustrated from failing to answer that I even looked up how to fix it on the internet. None of their fixes worked. By sheer accident I discovered they had changed the answer protocol from swipe up to swipe right. Hallelujah! I now feel safer, and my phone delivers me a more satisfying experience I have to learn about in order to be satisfied. They say you need to keep learning to stay young. My phone too? Horse patooey!
Don’t get me started on my computer….That rant could take up all the available space in the data center.
What else? Have I missed something? You betcha. I missed the crap they put in our food, noisy garbage trucks, people with broken arms who cannot use their turn signals, and feral cats among a million other things. I am exhausted!
The one thing I need to rant about is there’s just not enough time to rant about all that needs to be ranted about. That makes it difficult to choose my rant for each week. I’m imploring my readers to help me out and make some suggestions as to what they would like to see me rant about. Thank you in advance. Have a nice day.